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Author Topic: Getting old  (Read 1783 times)

Offline Shorty

Getting old
« on: June 14, 2013, 04:40 PM »
At the root of every gray hair, there is a dead brain cell.
Someone had to remind me,
So I'm reminding you, too.
Don't laugh.... It is all true!
Perks of reaching 50
Or being over 60
And heading towards
70 or beyond!

1.  Kidnappers are not very Interested in you.

2.  In a hostage situation, you are likely to be released first.

3.   No one expects you to run --Anywhere.

4.   People call at 9 PM (or 9 AM) and ask, 'Did I wake you?'

5.   People no longer view you as a Hypochondriac.

6.  There is nothing left tolearn the hard way.

7.   Things you buy now will never wear out.

8.  You can eat Supper at 4 PM.

9.  You can live without sex but not your glasses.

10.   You get into heated arguments about pension plans.

11. You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.

12. You quit trying to hold yourstomach in no matter who walks into the room.

13.   You sing along with elevator music.

14.   Your eyes won't get much worse.

15. Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.

16.   Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service.

17.   Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either.

18.   Your supply of brain cells is finally down to amanageable size.

19.   You can't remember who sent you this list.

AND THE MOST IMPORTANT THING:

Never, NEVER, NEVER ,
Under any circumstances,
Take a sleeping pill, and a laxative on
The same night!
Please excuse any spelling errors.   I have dyslexic fingers!
 
The following users thanked this post: ninjumper, Rosaly, Jules (:, Gus

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WebUser

  • Guest
Re: Getting old
« Reply #1 on: June 14, 2013, 05:35 PM »
Quote
AND THE MOST IMPORTANT THING:

Never, NEVER, NEVER ,
Under any circumstances,
Take a sleeping pill, and a laxative on
The same night!

OH yeah. 
 
The following users thanked this post: ninjumper, Jules (:, Gus

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