I just noticed the tags at the bottom of our forum Ella.

Lolololololol   

Could be worse I guess. There is no subject untouchable with us. Can you imagine some of the tags?
Diva cup for you
Bra size a must
Shoe size yea we need
The exhibitionist tales of LoopyLo
SPAG no that's not special peters and gonads
Toys
A nal
Books to make you squeal
Good for me, good for you

Boy I'm being silly tonight

 

This isn't a youtube vid, because it was uploaded directly to tumblr.
Why? Why do they make such a thing?

Lol

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This isn't a youtube vid, because it was uploaded directly to tumblr.
Why? Why do they make such a thing?

Lol

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OMG!  That is too funny.  The guy's accent really makes it, too.  It would sound too crass with an American accent.   

This isn't a youtube vid, because it was uploaded directly to tumblr.
Why? Why do they make such a thing?

Lol

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OMFG!!!!! Me and the best gay went shopping today and when we went into Boots (Pharmacy) in the mall we saw a 6ft cardboard cut-out of Rob in the perfume aisle.
I wanted to take a piccie of it but the security guard wouldn't let me.
Yep, you read that right Boots have employed a security guard for a cardboard cut-out!!
I asked the security guard why they had done this and he said that Boots was fed-up of having to try and stop people stealing "Rob" even though there's 3ft of solid glass in the middle of the cardboard to keep it in place!!
I think the guard thought I was on day release with how excited I was getting when I spotted it and I think my best gay thought I was going to go into labour early!!! 

Chatty ladies - I'm missing you all now that I'm back at school and crazy busy with 12+ hour days - and just found out today that annual plans normally due for completion in February need to submitted in December . . . on top of all of the usual end-of-year craziness, so I might be AWOL occasionally during the next 8 1/2 weeks.

If you are flagfic'ing anything, just check that all of the chapters are there - I flagged HEAT, only to discover the last few chapters are missing, so then I calibre'd instead.

I pressed pause on Grasping Darkness - just pause, not delete! I will return! - to read HEAT. Nine chapters in and it's very good!

And chapter 3 ... 

69



What happened? Lots of really bad fic, dispersed with a few - very few -  great ones! Of course, I started with "A" so there was a lot of rubbish.

Funnily enough, the really great "A" fic was AND With Thee Fade Away - note the AND - AWTFA!!! Not WTF Astro! 

And then Dusty finished, so I had to abandon the "A" ship and read it immediately and the rest of the "A"s were forgotten about.

Date of saving might be a better way - back in the beginning, I'd guess that we were all a little more discerning about what went into out TBRs.

I know I was - back then, in the olden days when you had to trek 7 miles in the snow just to get a twific (well, you had to copy and paste every chapter!  ), so it was only the ones that were highly rec'ed that got saved.

I didn't mind The Long Way Home - I probably rec'ed it and that's why you have it! 

I wish I could advise a way to attack the TBR - so many fics, so little time - and more good ones are being written right now!!! 

That's exactly how I'm feeling about Me & Mom Fall In Love ... I get a little buzz every time I get an alert.

Of course, Counselor was updating daily, but now that I'm hooked, she's gotten busy and it's only every few days 

You forgot another one ... spit or swallow!

Finally Singing To The Same Tune
Piano Tuner | NM, USA | Geography, Home Improvement, Musical Mayhem

(I’m a piano tuner in a sparsely populated area in the rural west. The phone rings.)

Me: “Hello, [Name] piano service.”

Caller: “Do you tune pianos?”

Me: “Yes I do. I also do all kinds of repairs, as well as complete restorations. The only thing I don’t do is moving.”

Caller: “Great! What’s the total cost for a tuning?”

Me: “I need some more information to give you a price. Do you know how long since it’s been tuned?”

Caller: “Well, we live on a ranch on long way from nowhere, and it’s been here since before 1900, so for sure at least that long. Our family has never spoken to a piano tuner before.”

Me: “Wow! That’s a really long time! I’m honored! So, do all the keys go up and down, and does each key make a sound?”

Caller: “Yes, we checked, and it actually doesn’t sound that bad. Out of tune of course but everything works.”

Me: “Great! You mentioned being on a ranch. How far from [city I'm in] are you?”

Caller: “We’re 25 miles outside of [town of 500 people, 200 miles away] on a gravel road that goes through a mountain pass. Well, actually, you have to cross the entire mountain range to get here. We own an entire valley.”

(I look up their location on Google maps, calculate the driving fee, and give them a price for a service package.)

Caller: “That’s a very fair price! Sold! But you don’t do the moving? Is there a mover you usually recommend?”

Me: “Yes, I have a favorite mover. Wait. ‘The’ moving? I’m not sure I follow. Oh, you’re moving it somewhere else before I tune it? I could contact my mover, tell them your location, and get a price, and get back to you.”

Caller: “Wait, what? Now I’m confused. We like your price on the tuning, but now we need to add the costs of the moves to know the total price?”

Me: “Moves? You’re moving it more than once? Am I tuning it, then it gets moved, and I tune it again? Is this all at once, or separate jobs? Now I’m lost!”

Caller: “Do you actually do this very often? We’d think you’d have the procedures and costs all worked out by now.”

Me: “I’m so sorry, but I’m not following you at all. Let’s start over. Where is it getting moved TO?”

Caller: “How would we know that? Are you being a smart-a**?”

Me: “What?”

Caller: “Where do you live?”

Me: “Why would you need to know that? Are you threatening me?”

Caller: “We DON’T need to know! And of COURSE we’re not threatening you! But YOU asked where it was getting moved to. For Christ’s sake!”

Me: *lightbulb goes off* “You want to move the piano to where I am?”

Caller: “Of course! How else are you going to tune it?”

(I am in stunned silence. In my entire career, no one has ever thought they had to deliver the piano to ME to have it tuned, and then have it moved back to their house.)

Caller: “Hello? Are you there?”

Me: “Yes. I’m here. I see the misunderstanding now. Piano tuners always drive to where the piano is, no matter how far away, and tune the piano where it’s at. The piano does not have to be brought to me. Pianos are NEVER brought TO the tuner. Tuners always go TO the piano. The price I gave you includes me driving all the way out there to your ranch and back home, staying at a motel if I have to, gas, tax, the work I’ll do, everything is included. There’s no need for a mover at all.”

(There is a prolonged silence before they continue.)

Caller: “We’re really not as stupid as you probably think we are right now. Really. No one here has the slightest idea what a piano tuner does, or how they do it, or what it costs. We’ve just been raising cattle for five generations out here, see, and… oh Christ.”

(I hear several people in the background start to laugh. I can’t help it and start laughing too. We’re all choking on laughter over the phone for at least a minute.)

Caller: “That’s a h*** of a long drive, so how about we get the guesthouse ready so you can stay overnight? Is cash okay? Do you like steak? What would you like for breakfast? If you like fishing we have miles of private streams. Bring a friend if you want; nothing but room up here!”

(I end up with more value in free-range gourmet steaks and wild trout packed in a huge ice chest, than my entire tuning package fee!)

Sometimes I wish I could write a story. A real, romantic, lovely fanfic... 

I gave you those funny stories before, but this want, I soooo want to read as a fanfic:

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So, just think about it:

Edward, of course is the tuner, perhaps he gives lessons too, perhaps he is broken by some evil cheating, secretly aborting ex (cough Tanya cough), that's why he doesn't pursue his former promising music career...

Bella is the caller, living with her family (brother Jasper, parents,...) on that ranch. I think she's a single mom to a little girl, perhaps her fiancé or better husband/highschool sweetheart (cough Mike cough) got killed by a bull/horse/wolf/rattlesnake. Now after some mourning she realizes that her little girl is quite musical and wants to give her the opportunity to learn to play the piano...

So, that call happens... Edward convinces his sister Alice to go with him... Edward sees Bella and her little girl, Alice sees Jasper...

Yeah, you know what will happen then, 

I have that story in my head and I'l love to read it as well, but writing it down myself? No way... 

But if some of you wants to... feel free! 

From Flagfic home page:

FLAG is currently unable to connect to ffnet / fictionpress, and it now appears that they are deliberately blocking FLAG's infrastructure

First the censorship police and now the plagiarism police - me thinks the power has gone to ffnet's head!

If the censorship thing wasn't the beginning of the end for ffnet, I wonder if this might be the nail in the coffin.

My e-reader is too antique to connect to the internet - if I can't save a pdf/epub from ff.net, I won't be able to read from there!

I guess this could be God's way of telling me to stop adding to my TBR and read what I've already got - gluttony is one of the 7 Sins!